Courage and Determination We Can All Learn From

Tori has traveled a long way. On June 29, 2009, she left her abusive husband of thirteen years, took her children, and fled to a friend in Chicago. It took true courage for her to walk away without a safety net and without a clear path for herself and her seven young children. She found the courage because she knew she had to get herself and her children to safety.

I had the honor of meeting and getting to know Tori a few weeks ago, and found myself incredibly moved by her story, her poise, and her determination.

To hear Tori’s story in her own words, and to hear what the staff at The Cara Program (a nonprofit here in Chicago), have to say about her and the need she seeks support for, go to our website at www.benevolent.net and click on the link at the top that says “Tori.”

“My kids are some of the most amazing kids…”

In the 28 months since her leap to safety, Tori has journeyed through shelters, transitional housing, job readiness programs, and now to stability. She’s gotten herself and her children to a place of security. She’s working full time, she has an apartment, and the kids are in school and thriving – playing sports, excelling in academics, and bringing home As and Bs with every report card.

Tori has plans for her children – she expects each one to go to college and encourages them all to excel in everything they pursue. Sometimes, however, she has to say “no.” Whether it’s a field trip she can’t afford, the right equipment for football, or a volleyball tournament team trip, Tori has had to tell her children over and over again that they can’t afford things. There’s no money for extras.

She’s okay with that, but the one thing she is focusing on for the next steps forward is a computer for her family. Tori is determined that her kids will be educated, strong and independent. Right now, Tori’s kids have to go to the library after school or after their sports practices so that they can get online and complete the parts of their homework for which they need a computer. This means that the kids are away from her and outside the house more, that Tori can’t monitor them while they’re online, and that she can’t be there to motivate and help them while they’re doing homework on the computer.

For Tori, the inability to parent her kids in these instances is untenable. She takes pride in her children’s health, happiness, and success. Now, while she’s financially stable for the basics like rent, utilities, food and clothing, Tori is seeking our help in meeting her primary goal – being the best mom she can be to her kids.

We estimate that a computer with the necessary programs, a mouse, virus protection, etc, will be $705. Tori has researched internet access and found that she can get it for under $10 per month, and she can cover that on a regular basis.

Torti’s is an interesting need in that she is focusing on her children’s next steps, goals and plans. She is so clearly striving to achieve and succeed in the face of obstacles and barriers - I feel it will be an honor to help Tori to meet her need.

Here’s what we can do - if you want to help support Tori’s need, please go to the link on our website at www.benevolent.net that says “Donate Now.” There, you can click on a link to PayPal where you can submit a contribution. The PayPal page is truly not pretty, but it works.

As soon as we’ve received the total amount needed for Tori to buy a computer for her family, we’ll send the money along to The Cara Program -- the nonprofit that provides Tori with job training and personal support -- and they will get the funds to Tori for the computer. We’ll update her page on our website so that you know not to send any more contributions for her.

By supporting Tori’s need, you’ll be helping her get the computer for her family, and you’ll also be helping us here at Benevolent as we build our model. With every need that’s filled we’ll use about 3.5% to cover credit card and processing costs and 6.75% to cover our own costs here at Benevolent. We’ve already factored that into the amount we need to raise to meet this need.

Whether or not you decide to help Tori, we’re glad that you know her now, as we do. She’s a strong woman with a story of courage and determination, and I have all the belief in the world that she and her kids will go far and impress us all.

- Megan Kashner, Founder & CEO

Doing the Right Thing 15+ Years Ago is Working Against Denise Today

Denise did what she needed to and followed the rules. Now she’s lost her job and she and her children are living at a shelter.

Denise was a teenage mom. When her child was born, she continued her education, receiving some Temporary Aid for Need Families support while she went to high school. She made it through her junior year before she found herself having to make the tough decision to drop out of school. She had struggled to find safe, nurturing child care for her son while she was in school, but when her senior year came around, she was out of child care options and chose to put her son first and stay with him.

In the following years, Denise went to school to become certified as a Certified Nursing Assistant (CNA). She was able to do this because CNA training is one of the select training paths one can take in Illinois and still qualify for TANF, subsidized child care, food stamps, and other services.

Once she had her CNA, Denise found a job working with seniors and people with disabilities. She worked full time, uninterrupted, for fifteen years as her family grew, her skills increased, and she matured into adulthood. Denise had never been homeless never had to seek out TANF any further, until this recession.

In March, the facility where Denise worked shut down. When she pursued a new job in her field, she found that the field had changed, shrunk, and that there were not jobs readily available. She’s been seeking work since March and only last month had to give up her apartment and move herself and her children to a shelter. She has gone back to school for her GED, hoping to go on to train as a medical assistant. Last school session, though, she had to drop out because she didn’t have the bus fare to get to her classes regularly.

When Denise sought help, TANF, food stamps, and other supports this year, she found that she was ineligible for most public supports because in her teens she had exhausted the 60-month lifetime limit for support. This meant that doing the right thing for her son when she was 17 years old precludes her from receiving much help now, in the depths of the recession. While I’m not sure whether the crafters of welfare reform in the 1990s meant for this to be the case, it is the reality for Denise.

Today, we post Denise’s simple request. She’s finding it almost impossible to persevere in her job search, get to class and the library, and manage her progress forward without being able to access even public transportation. Denise is asking for three months of a hand in the form of three monthly bus passes for the Chicago Transit Authority. It’s not a large request, only $280, but Denise has a plan and a path, and simply needs help getting to and from it.

As always, you can support Benevolent member needs at www.benevolent.net. We are pleased to report that Anne's need, posted less than two weeks ago, has been met in full. We hope to continue to prove the Benevolent model with the fulfillment of this need in the weeks before the launch of Benevolent't real site.

- megan kashner

Founder & CEO

A Bed of One’s Own

Last week, Anne told us that what she really needs right now is a mattress. She explained that she and her 10- year- old son are currently sleeping on an air mattress, and that this air mattress was sure to pop soon, as all the ones before it have done.

Today, let's start raising the $430 for Anne's bed.

Her request was so basic, so modest – a mattress to put on the floor to sleep on with her son – that I felt compelled to encourage her to think bigger and to ask for a bed, complete with box spring, mattress, and simple frame.

“I don’t want my son to have to sleep on the floor.”

To read Anne’s story in her own words, and to read what the staff at The Cara Program, a nonprofit here in Chicago, have to say about her and the need she seeks support for today,watch a video of Anne describing her situation right at the bottom of this blog. Then you can go to our website at www.benevolent.net and click on the link at the top that says “Anne's Need."

Anne has a plan and a vision for her life. She has lived through violence, unemployment, and homelessness. Now she’s working, living with a friend, and saving up all her money for her own place for herself and her son. She hopes to achieve this goal in the new year and to have enough room so that she and her son can each have a bed, among other things.

Anne’s story is very common, yet when you meet her or watch her video, she doesn’t easily fit into any stereotypes we have of those who are homeless. She is in that category of “precariously housed,” or “couch-homeless.” Estimates from the National Coalition for the Homeless tell us that approximately 1.65% of the entire U.S. population fits into this category. That’s upwards of 5 million people couch surfing, without a place of their own.

What a bed will mean to Anne will be the end to spending $20 each on a series of air mattresses that pop in the middle of the night about a month into their use. It will mean a place that is hers – where she can sit and read, work with her son on homework, listen to him tell her about his day at school, and watch him sleep. It means his sleep will be uninterrupted and secure. The bed will be hers – not someone’s stained hand-me-down, not something she feels obliged to someone for, just hers. In a bare subsistence life like Anne’s, that means a great deal.

Anne’s is the first need we’ll be posting to our site and opening up for support. Our real website will launch sometime next month with many more people’s stories and needs, but we chose Anne as our first and we hope you’ll help us make her an example of the power of personal stories to spur action and support.

Here’s what we can do - if you want to help support Anne's need, please go to the link on our website at www.benevolent.net that says “Donate Now.” There, you can click on a link to PayPal where you can submit a contribution. The PayPal page is truly not pretty, but it works.

As soon as we’ve received the total amount needed for Anne to buy a bed for herself and her son, we’ll send the money along to The Cara Program -- the nonprofit that supports Anne with regard to job training and support -- and they will get the funds to Anne for the bed. We’ll update her page on our website so that you know not to send any more contributions for her.

By supporting Anne’s need, you’ll be helping her get the bed for herself and her son, but you’ll also be helping us here at Benevolent as we learn what works best. As with every need, we’ll use about 6.75% to cover our own costs (including credit card processing – ouch!) here at Benevolent. We’ve already factored that into the amount we need to raise to meet this need.

Whether you’re someone who will decide to help Anne or not, we’re glad that you know her now, as we do.

2006 was the last time Anne had a bed of her own. Her simple statement, “I don’t want my son to have to sleep on the floor,” is really all I needed to hear.

- Megan Kashner, Founder & CEO